Couples Counselling Christchurch

Over the years, many couples have approached me for relationship counselling in Christchurch because they feel lost and stuck or like their communication has degraded beyond repair. Relationship problems can happen to anyone, but they do not have to mean the end. Approaching these issues with a qualified relationship counsellor and the right mindset can rebuild the foundations of a relationship to be much stronger than before.

Flexibility, understanding, communication, and compassion are all crucial components of a balanced, healthy relationship. These aspects can be taught or strengthened if they are lacking or weakened.

At Winchester Counselling, we offer couple counselling in Christchurch through Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). We offer in-person and online couples counselling. Contact us today to book your consultation.

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RELATIONSHIP, MARRIAGE, & COUPLES COUNSELLING THROUGH EMOTIONALLY FOCUSED THERAPY

At Winchester Counselling, our couples therapy in Christchurch uses evidence-based methods that have been researched and refined with real-world people. In my understanding, Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples is the best evidence-based international practice for working with couples.

The approach focuses on deconstructing unhelpful communication methods that have become habitual for the couple and supplementing them with compassionate, understanding patterns of interaction.

Marriage Counselling Services in Christchurch

We can tailor our marriage counselling in Christchurch to align with your relationship and specific situation. We offer pre-marital counselling sessions and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy:

Pre-marital Counselling

Starting your marital journey with clear communication and shared understanding is essential to creating a lifetime of connection and joy. Pre-marital couple counselling in Christchurch gives couples the emotional tools to take this big step together.

We work with couples, exploring the crucial aspects of your future life together. Our pre-marital relationship counselling offers Christchurch couples a safe space to discuss financial goals, family planning, career aspirations, and personal values.

Rather than waiting for challenges to arise, we can help you develop strong communication patterns and understanding, serving as the backbone of your relationship. During sessions, I help couples learn to:

  • Express needs and desires in ways that foster connection.
  • Navigate differences in values and expectations with compassion.
  • Build strategies for managing future conflicts constructively.
  • Develop deeper emotional intimacy and understanding.
  • Create shared goals and visions for your future together.

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Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT)

I break Emotionally FocusedCouples Therapy in Christchurch down into three stages:

Stage One: Discovering Negative Patterns in a Relationship or Marriage 

There is an old saying that "the first step to solving a problem is acknowledging it". Stage one of EFT is based on this principle. In order to disassemble the negative patterns that might be creating toxicity and relationship issues, the couple must first recognise when they are happening.

Through EFTcouples counselling in Christchurch, I focus on helping couples become aware of any negative patterns they have fallen into, any communication pitfalls, and any feelings of resentment that may be fuelling recurring issues. Essentially, we "clear the air". Then, we work on building strategies to cope with conflicts—both big and small—in a healthy way.

Finally, I teach couples the concept of 'creating space' for the other to speak, allowing them to delve into the more difficult questions about their relationship. These issues may be anything from one partner’s lack of care and support to affairs, cheating, and trust issues.

Stage Two: Creating New Habits That Support a Healthy Relationship

Once the couple has started to consistently recognise patterns that they fall into and have begun to deconstruct them, we can move on to building more effective methods of communication. This stage helps foster understanding and compassion, which are key in a long-term relationship.

These sessions aim to teach the couple how to communicate thoughts and feelings to each other in an easily understandable way that is sensitive to the other person. I help couples understand each other's emotions, longings, and fears more clearly, teaching them how to communicate thoughts and feelings in understandable and heartfelt ways. This approach to relationship counselling in Christchurch helps create or repair a strong bond or attachment.

We work on helping each partner see the other as equal and valued and then expressing those feelings even when discussing difficult topics. This helps couples feel bonded—that it's them against the problem, not them against each other. A crucial part of this stage is rekindling feelings of support, intimacy, and compassion between each other, which helps re-establish intimacy and joy.

Stage Three: Moving Forward To a Better Future Together

The last stage of EFT marriage counselling in Christchurch involves building the confidence each person needs to implement their learned strategies. Clarity, confidence, and a positive outlook are all vital.

The last few sessions focus on practising the new communication methods and analysing the couple's interaction throughout the EFT. Establishing that there has been a trajectory of improvement helps the couple to place their trust in the process outside of therapy. When they move on from the sessions, they can keep using the techniques they have learned to create positive interactions (even during moments of conflict).

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Benefits of Relationship Counselling for Christchurch Couples

Counselling offers numerous benefits, helping couples strengthen their relationships, build confidence, and maintain positive interactions, even during conflicts. Some of the key benefits of couple counselling in Christchurch include:

  • Stronger foundations: Build a resilient relationship based on mutual understanding and respect.
  • Enhanced communication: Learn to express your thoughts and feelings in easily understandable ways sensitive to your partner.
  • Improved conflict resolution: Transform your approach to disagreements, working together against problems rather than against each other.
  • Deeper emotional understanding: Gain clarity on each other’s emotions, learning to recognise and respond to your partner’s emotional needs.
  • Renewed intimacy and trust: Rekindle feelings of support, compassion, and connection.
  • Long-lasting positive changes: Develop sustainable improvements beyond your counselling sessions, helping you maintain positive interactions through life’s challenges.
  • Tools and strategies for future challenges: Gain practical techniques for maintaining healthy, long-term relationships, recognise potential issues early, and address them constructively.

Why Choose Us

We offer specialised couples counselling in Christchurch, led by myself, Andrew Winchester. In 2018, I became the third male counsellor in New Zealand to achieve the status of certification as a therapist in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFCT). In 2023, I became the first male counsellor in New Zealand certified as a supervisor in EFCT with the International Centre of Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy. I also belong to the New Zealand Association of Counsellors (NZAC) and the New Zealand Community of Emotionally Focused Therapy (NZCEFT).

With a strong academic background and years specialising in EFT, I’m committed to providing a safe, supportive, and personalised approach tailored to your unique needs, ensuring a positive and successful counselling experience for every couple.

Christchurch’s Local Couple Counselling

What Other Couples Say About Us

"My partner and I found Andrew to be incredibly skilled at facilitating emotionally-charged, honest (and sometimes difficult) conversations between us – always in a safe, supportive and caring environment. He gave us some great tools and insights to help us move forward in our relationship. Andrew is an absolute pro and we have already recommended him to some of our close friends."

- Confidential client.

Frequently Asked Questions

What kinds of issues can couples counselling in Christchurch help with?

Through effective relationship counselling in Christchurch, I can help local couples navigate various issues, including:

  • One partner"s lack of care or support.
  • Feelings of not mattering, failing, or not being good enough or worthy.
  • Affairs, cheating, or issues with trust and fidelity.
  • Difficulty initiating intimacy or physical/sexual affection.
  • Partner experiencing depression, anxiety, stress, or anger issues.
  • Trouble with parenting approaches.
  • Partner experiencing addiction (sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling, and affairs).

What can I expect from relationship counselling in Christchurch?

The therapy is short-term, structured, and designed to support a couple through their journey of reconnection. More than anything, I focus on creating a safe space for my clients where they can effectively communicate their hopes, dreams, and fears to each other without any toxic or habitual behaviours breaking the interaction down. Then, I help them to learn better, more constructive habits on which to base their continuing relationship, which I accomplish through the three stages of EFT.

Do both partners need to be present for couples therapy to be effective?

Both partners attending couples therapy in Christchurch is incredibly beneficial for improving relationship dynamics and personal growth. However, couples counselling for one partner can still benefit couples, focusing on individual development and understanding to significantly enhance your relationship dynamic.

Book Your Initial Consultation Today

I"m a qualified counsellor focused on improving your quality of life, no matter your situation. If you and your partner are experiencing problems with your relationship and are ready for a resolution, take control and contact Winchester Counselling today. Discover our approach to professional, effective relationship, marriage, and couples counselling in Christchurch.

Together, we can change from disconnection and frustration to a secure, trusting, and loving relationship; contact now!